This is not about the weekend as such but the weekdays. The thoughts of the past week still would not leave me, stretching my woes to the weekend.
Somehow, right now I feel so elated and light. The week has actually passed. To me it felt like an eternity and not just five days. I was almost feigned that the course the days were taking and the the situations that caught me were determined to undermine me. No matter how much I tried life stood undeterred from its disturbing ways.
I know, some people will suggest positive thinking. Though I would like to believe so too but at such times positive thinking is just a state of mind that helps us keep our sanity. Otherwise, the way situations are going deep within ourselves we are aware life will take its course at its own pace. Still, we must applaud man for dividing time into years, month’s weeks, days, hours etc. At least, the pain and confusion we encounter is in by parts. I convinced myself of a less tiring weekend emotionally physically and mentally.
The Irony is that by the time weekend actually knocked at my doors I had lost control. I was almost transformed to a senile cranky wife and and a touchy, subdued Mother. This is not I, I thought. I am generally the last person to lose control but this time…
I was not myself anymore. I had unknowingly surrendered to the gloomy weather, illness and rains that had flooded my life last week... I vowed I would come out of it and enjoy this weekend. Then something caught my attention. The desk clock surprised me... It was 00.00 Sunday. Yes, you guessed it right while I had been trying to rejuvenate my tired and bored cells Sunday had arrived.
This made my already overfed mind more restless. Another week was to begin in 24 hours. Anxiety peaked up again. I am aware a vicious circle is waiting to entrap the victim again. Mind you this time I am refusing to budge. I will try to love the elapsing time and and try to manage such tough hours in a better way.
I intend to let the week gone by be by gone. I will start a fresh.
I am hoping for a less chaotic and happier week ahead
Hope you too have a happy week ahead.